Being Loved Whole

by - Saturday, April 07, 2018

  I still get massive amounts of anxiety when I think of being fully vulnerable. For a lot of my younger years, I considered being vulnerable weakness. I'd watch movies of strong, courageous women or read books of independent coming-of-age girls and I took notes on their survival mechanisms. The overall takeaway for me was: do not under any circumstances be weak.

  Last night while I was talking with my husband I realized that in order to be fully loved, I have to uncover the dark, hidden things in my heart. Things that I've considered so ugly that I never dared to say out loud. Because to be loved in those places, with everything exposed, is to be loved as one whole being. In my marriage, I've noticed God's extension of love through my husband. The unconditional, unwavering example of what Christ is to the church and it makes me so thankful for him. Last night when I uncovered my hurts to Andrew, it allowed him to love me in places that I had previously boxed up and shoved to the corners of my heart. Things so deep, deep down that I had forgotten about them. All I did was expose light to them. Things that stay hidden and in secret will always have power over us and they loose their power as soon as they are exposed to the light. 

  If you want healing in all areas of your life, I challenge you to expose the things that bring shame and destruction. Then, let the Lord love you there. You can never know what it means to be fully loved if you keep those things hidden in the dark. It's time to turn the light back on.


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